so, i haven’t been reading

so, i haven’t been reading the news lately. i don’t know what’s happening in the world. i think someone got shot at LAX. by an El Al security guard, that seems strange. i have been playing games.

also i am less interested in the news. i can feel some things are about to change soon. hmm, it makes me nervous/anxious. like before a solo tryout, when you could run or throw up or scream, and you know there will be new people but you’ll really be all alone for a while. and you don’t know what to do. philip said before he knew he was going to england he felt like he was on a cliff. i will probably never completely appreciate him. there are so many things happening now i can’t control them, it’s like tossing a coin without knowing what the sides will mean. who knows what will happen. it’s more than a little scary.